Thoughts of a Deathknight
by Dexelator
Summary: A large amount of short stories of my character, Slyand, and her thoughts and journey's through Azeroth. This was made up over a few years and lore wise some of this is not correct. But the events that happen in the story are events that had happened to me in the game, World of Warcraft, on the RP realm of Argent Dawn (EU). I'm not a great writer so easy on the criticism.
1. A Broken Mind

A Broken Mind Chris Howard 12/02/12

I stared over the frozen wasteland of Dragonblight, the wind whipping at my hair. So many memories here...Maybe more to come. I knelt down and brushes away the snow over the rock. I sighed as I remembered the small engraving. Standing up, I pulled the scarf from around my face and brought my gaze over Wintergarde Keep. Silverflame was over...Shield Of Providence was over...All the friends I tried dear to hang on to were gone. That sure said something about my character. I guess a Deathknight will always be deemed untrustworthy, no matter how hard they tried.

I saw the tower that over looked the Wintergarde Keep town. Where did I go wrong?  
_"I'll tell you where you went wrong, them! All of them! You know what you are, you shouldn't have even tried."_ My conscience rang out loud, making me furious.  
"They were my friends, I trust them regardless of what goes wrong." I shouted to myself. Was I truly insane?  
_"Friends? Friends?! If they were your friends, they wouldn't have hurt you, left you, do all the things they did! One of you so called 'friends' killed you! Who brought you back? Pick yourself up? I DID!"_ I couldn't bear hearing the truth. She did bring me back, she did help me. I am what I am...

I'm a killing machine. I was raised again to reign destruction. I couldn't help what I am...Not anymore.


	2. Worthless

Worthless Chris Howard 12/02/12

_"Forget it Slyand, you're worthless. You couldn't protect them and now they are dead! DEAD!"_ It echoed through my mind a million times, tearing me apart on the inside. Did my failure lead them to death? The dark green of the forest illuminated from the surrounding trees as I stared at the graves that lay before me, taunting me, teasing me. Lucky bastards. They had what I've always wanted. I quivered in my plate armour and I pulled down the scarf I was wearing. If I could change one -  
_"You can't change anything now. The past has been and gone and you failed them all. You had the opportunity to save them all - Your family, your friends!"_  
"That's not true, I couldn't have done anything. It was just all so...fast..."  
_"Just fast? Years and years of training just to say it went too FAST?! You're pathetic Slyand, worthless..."_  
The last words gutted me. It felt like a deathly cold blade has slowly sunk its way through my heart and out the other side. I turned to heave myself onto my Deathcharger, daring not to argue with my own conscience...

_**I was worthless...**_


	3. A Second Chance

A Second Chance Chris Howard 12/02/12

Cloudy thoughts and memories littered my mind sending me into turmoil and confusion. _"Get up."._ That voice, so distinct. I was too familiar with it. It was me only...not -me-._"I said get up!"._My head shot up and my body along with so I was sitting up. Still everything was blurry but I could make out a ring of orcs around me all waiting me for me to stand. I could not see past their broad shoulders and chests but I knew I had to get away. Next to me lay my runesword, glittered in blood which shone in the light. _"Get up! You wont last if you're on your behind!"._She was right, I wouldn't I grabbed the runesword by its hilt and slowly dragged it up as I stood. It's power ran through my arm back into me surging me into a new life. How I ended on the floor was beyond me but I wouldn't let it happen again. I put my already broken and battered body into battle stance again. Blood dripped from my wounds. It didn't bother me. _"There we go, shall we finish this?"_ A gut wrenching laughter sounded from the back of my mind which made me duplicate it. A horrible laughter, filled with anger and menace but most of all, it was filled with the need to kill.

And I loved it.


	4. A Terrifying Work of Art

A Terrifying Work of Art Chris Howard 12/02/12

Bloodied limbs and severed heads covered the jungle area around me. The scent of blood filled the air around me. My armour was so jagged from so many hits and slashes from the enemy that it no longer looked like the armour I used to adorn with pride. My runesword was still in pristine condition only covered in a thick layer of dark blood but its blue glyphs shone through, brighter than ever. "Did I do this?" I said quietly to myself as my eyes scanned over the art of anarchy. _"Yes, this is you Slyand. This is what you do best. Splatter the blood of the enemy across the floor. Sear their minds and souls with images of their brethren being decapitated by you. You were destined to wreak havoc."_ Her voice echoed through my head. She was gruelling and blood thirsty but she spoke nothing but the truth to me._"Let's go get cleaned up...Such a shame to leave such a terrifying work of art behind."_

I regained my senses and began to walk down the road. Hope no one was to be as foolish as those orcs, nobody should be foolish to stop us on our journey to nowhere.


	5. Grizzly Best Memories

Grizzly Best Memories Chris Howard 12/02/12

Grizzly Hills...I remember this place almost too well. On the edge of the cliff I could see the lodge where I met Liviticus for the first time. Something happened in that building that had caused me to befriend him and get closer to him. _"He was worthless, he left you!"_ I ignored the remark from the back of my mind, trying to remember the time in the lodge. Unfortunately it wasn't a pleasant memory as men and women lay wounded and dying all around. The battle at Amberpine Lodge where the Horde attacked, it was still a great time despite nearly dying...again. "Let go of the memories Slyand, he left you. They all left you and turned their back on you. You weren't good enough for them...And you sure are better than they are..." My conscience was tearing me apart. "Quiet! Without him, I would have died over and over again, he was everything a friend could be!" I screamed out loud and it echoed back as if the mountains were screaming at me too. _"Everything a friend could be?! If he was a friend, he would have forgiven the acts you did to Brinna and not have stabbed you and left you to waste in that town!"_ "You did that! You did that to Brinna! You tortured her, seized control on me and tortured her! **I hate you! HATE YOU!**" I screamed with every bit of my body yet it wasn't enough. She was too powerful against me. I was too powerful against me.

I collapsed on the ground and beat at it until the skin behind my gauntlets were torn. I lay there, waiting...


	6. It Was An Accident

It Was An Accident... Chris Howard 14/02/12

I watched the blood trickle through the edges of the pavement. "What have I done?"_"What you had to..."_ I didn't have to, I managed to lose control of myself and cause chaos. Because of -her-. My runesword clattered on the ground, breaking my train of thought. I wasn't aware that I had let go of the hilt. I knelt down to pick it back uo until my mind was flooded with pictures of the boy's face. It seared me, tortured me, reminding me of the devilish deed I had done. I screamed out in pain but most of all I screamed out in anger and frustration. _"Quiet! You'll bring the guards here!"_ I wanted just that. Shut myself away so I couldn't hurt anyone anymore. My body moved itself after picking up the runesword and sprinted away.

Why did you get in my way small child? **Why?**


	7. A Realisation

A Realisation Chris Howard 14/02/12

Was I truly a monster? The question continuously managed to worm its way through into my mind. I told myself I wasn't. I knew I had problems but surely the good outweighs the bad? _"Wrong..."_ I sighed knowing she was back. _"Don't give me that tone."_ "What tone should I be giving then? Should I be happy that you're here?" _"Maybe you should feel relieved. I am after all helping you pass through potential threats."_ "Threats? THREATS?!" I screamed, "You consider a young child a threat?!" _"He was mocking us. I'm trying to make you realise who you really are!"_ I wanted to die. She drove me insane with anger and frustration. The cold wind whipped my hair sending it in front of my face. I pulled my scarf up in front of my mouth again realising what I had to do...I had to find Liviticus, where ever he may be. Would he still hate me? Would he think I'm a monster after all I've done wrong?

I hope he sees my situation...I can't tell him about**her**... _"Good luck...You won't last without me"_I scowled knowing she was right.


	8. A Worthwhile Journey

A Worthwhile Journey Chris Howard 14/02/12

Wintergarde Keep. So many memories resided here. Liviticus, Aneira, Brinna, the Silverflames. Granted not all memories were great but in the end they had always led to the best memories. I glanced down at the Silverflame tabard that lay in my hands. I grinned at the past when I first met Zadina and Elendrin. They were fine days. _"You were going to execute one of their members, you consider that a fine memories?"_ She would never understand what I had seen in so many people. I saw beyond their hard outer appearance while she sought to kill and destroy.

I stuffed the tabard back in my bag and began to make my way up the mountain into Wintergarde Keep. _"I wouldn't do that if I were you, you may find much more than you seek"_ I laughed at her and grinned menacingly. "You are me but we are still going there, like it or not." She stayed quiet then as if I had humiliated her. I had to find Liviticus or Aneira at the least.


	9. You're a Disaster

"You're a Disaster" Chris Howard 14/02/12

I stood at the top of the tower overlooking the small town below the keep. I could not remember why I had come up here or how I even got up here. I wanted to turn around and head down the stairs but wasn't able to move. Something held me in place. _"Why Slyand? Why do you need to find him? Do you honestly believe that telling him about us will solve everything, much less believe he will forgive you for the agony you caused him? He killed you once, he will do it again after seeing that you really are psychopathic. He's made new friends, better friends than you ever were and now he has forgotten all about the good things you supposedly did. Now he sees you as a threat, an abomination. A disaster... The moment you come back to him, he would have drawn swords against you and fight you. This is a pathetic journey Slyand. You know that..."_ The invisible force let go of me and she had remained silent. I was too weak to even hold myself up and I fell to my knees.

No, she wasn't going to convince me, this journey must go on. He had to forgive me...Right?


	10. A Hopeful Note Hopefully

A Hopeful Note Hopefully Chris Howard 16/02/12

I felt sick to the stomach by just walking into the room. It was still the same as the day when I went insane. The very same books on the shelves and the table and ornaments haven't been touched. It was scary knowing what I knew happened here. The bloodshed, the trauma...All those fights... I could have sworn I had smelt the scent of my own blood here amongst the others. _"Why are we here Slyand?"_ She questioned me curiously. "I need to know where Liviticus or Aneira are, they may have been here recently." She sighed in my mind. "_It is useless Slyand, even if you do find them, they'll bring you nothing but troubles as they always do."_ Again, I ignored her false remarks knowing that I was the only one who ever brought trouble into their lives much less my own. I searched high and low for any signs of Liviticus but I found none. I decided to leave a letter or note if he were to ever come round this place again.

I left a note signed by me in hopes that Liviticus finds it.

**I hope he does...**


	11. Doubts and Worries

Doubts And Worries Chris Howard 17/02/12

I sat and watched the waves crash against the cliff walls beneath my feet. It was a long way down for sure. Long and rocky. Even If I didn't die hitting the rocks, the waves would make short work of me after...

Wait what? What the fel was I thinking? I'm no quitter or a loser. I'm stronger and better than that. I pulled myself up from the cliff edge and watched the sunrise above the Frozen Ocean. I've seen many spectacular things before, but this was brilliant spectacle. One that I should be around for a lot longer to see.

I stood next to the cliff for what seemed like hours. It had only been several hours or so since I left the note but still I was agonising over the wait. "Maybe I should go back there..." I quietly said to myself. _"Why? So you're so called -friend- will find it? Admit it, he's forgotten about you and is never returning here again. Besides, you do know he hated Dragonblight because of its dreary weather..."_ She was right though. Doubt started to crowd me my making my bones weak and tremble.

Maybe I could just end it all by jumping...I looked down at the sharp rocks and crashing waves.


	12. Long Forgotten Feelings

Long Forgotten Feelings Chris Howard 18/02/12

Why was I back here? I don't know what motive I had. I had left the note only a few hours ago, why was I so eager to come back only to be disappointed that the note had not been touched? I sighed but continued anyway walking into the room. I glanced quickly at the room and was about to walk right out again when I noticed a difference.

A knife. A knife in the table. It was strange that someone had come in here to embed a knife in the table. I slowly walked up to it; a million thoughts accompanied by doubts flooded my mind. The knife had been stabbed through my note and another note saying **"I. Will. Find. You."**

A strange feeling overcame me. A feeling I had not felt in such a long time. He had to still be around here. He can't have gone far.

For once my conscious had stayed quiet. She knew she was finished and she shouldn't be back for a very long time...


	13. Brutal Intentions

Brutal Intentions Chris Howard 19/02/12

Why'd she have to fight like that? So brutal and disgusting..._"Quiet Slyand, I'm enjoying this, this is what you're built for anyway, enjoy it while you can."_ Ergh, she was sickening me. The longer we were together the more insane I'd become and eventually do something I'd regret..._"Hey Slyand, you know what? Seeming as they're tearing each other's faces off, why don't I step in and give them a little hand, after all, when they finally lay on the floor all bloody and torn up, I can nurse...at least one back to health."_ She laughed at the back of my mind. I can't let her out, she'd do something horrible!

The fight went on a bit until I called Adaeron over to stop the fight. One lay jawless and faceless while the other pissing blood from her face. I started to move over to them. _"Now, now Slyand...Let me take over from here..."_ Wait, no! I called out in my mind, warning her.

_"Relax Slyand...I won't do something you'll regret later...Hopefully..."_ The chilling laugh went through my mind as i watched quietly as she controlled me...


	14. That Sickening Feeling

Chris Howard That Sickening Feeling 21/02/12

I was on another one of my pleasant strolls through the woods, feeling the air gently caress my exposed skin. Oh, how I longed to feel its chill like any other person. I wanted to do the things they did, only 529 and dead only to be raised as a Deathknight to walk around Azeroth not being able to feel, sleep and cry like any other person. I watched them all, all the couples together in the inn. The air was full of love, yet I could not experience it myself. Was this Elune's cruel curse on me? Deprive me of everything just maturing? It sickened me watching them, I had to leave. That's how I got into the woods again, merely trying to hide away from what I could not have. Everyone had a place here, but me.

I sat down against a tree trunk. I had only wished to be put at rest...Why was it so hard?


	15. Haunting Mistakes

Chris Howard Haunting Mistakes 23/02/12

As soon as the word left my mouth, i knew I had said the stupidest thing..."Crimson Dawn" I said. Henral looked at me dumbfounded. "Crimson Dawn?" he then questioned. I blinked and apologised for the mistake. I knew I had just dimmed my chances of getting into the Crimson Dusk right then and there.

Against the odds and after you many stupid answers I gave, I somehow managed to get in. I did not like the feeling of making a mockery of myself and quickly left to go on a ride through the woods again.

I galloped through the woods and weaved through the many trees and bushes which were scattered along the way._"Crimson Dawn?! Oh, that's rich Slyand! RICH I say!"_She's back? Why now of all times...I just wanted to be amongst my own thoughts. _"Hey, remember what I said about you - "She_ started but I cut her off. "I don't want to hear it, I didn't see you try to give me a hand there, and couldn't you have at least told me what to say so we -both- don't look like bloody morons?" _"I was having too much fun watching you sound like an idiot. Why don't you do something more useful and go kill something..."_

I ignored her and kept galloping aimlessly through the woods. I did sounds like an idiot...


	16. Like Searing Iron

Chris Howard Like A Searing Iron... 24/02/12

I was sitting on the grass taking in the sun as it was about to set. I sighed and opened my eyes staring at the four tabards that I had laid in front of me on the ground. Conquest, Silverflame, Shield of Providence and now the new addition, Crimson Dusk. It was a shame the first three had failed but the Duskers looked promising. They were well organised and they respected one another. I hope I can be able to prove myself again...

After a long time thinking about the past, I noticed the sun had already gone done and was pitch black around me. "I better head back then..." I started; _"Why Slyand, do you want to go back to them? You saw them, you are stronger than they think you are. You're a weapon, not some pathetic slave they see you as."_ She kept popping up; it was so unfair for her to keep torturing me like this_. "Torture? Slyand, stop being the pathetic fuck you are and get over it. Your old life is gone and now they made you into a weapon capable of anything. I am trying to help you. You just don't see it!"_ Her words stung me. It was the most pain I've ever felt in a long time. It burnt and stung me like a hot iron searing into my skin.

I sat there for some time after in total silence. I packed the three tabards and wore the last. I slowly made my way back to Westguard, the pain still burning inside me.


	17. Paladins

Chris Howard Paladins... 26/02/12

I wasn't sure how he had found me and I wasn't sure why he wanted me dead...again. I looked at him as I stood still in the middle of the tall grass that went up to my knees and he looked back with hate in his eyes. It was at that moment when I twitched and couldn't move my arms and legs. That's when I knew she stepped into my place. She always did that, she loved to fight.

He must have known I was distracted...Well -I- was but not her. She obviously tried to look distracted to get him to take the first swing. He began running with his gleaming sword unsheathed and pointing right at me. His armour swayed as he moved and the sun gleamed off the shiny silver surfaces of it. He quickly brought the sword up about to swing only a few steps away from us. Why hadn't she drawn her sword yet? The man's sword came down fast, but I was faster. I managed to sidestep past the swing and his blade came down onto the ground. She suddenly unsheathed the runeblade. It gleamed and ran with energy up and down its blade edge. The man regained focus, took his sword out from the ground and swing it at my side. She brought he sword in a downwards arc to meet his and the blades clashed with a brilliant, bright blue light. We'd seen this kind of light before. When me and Liviticus fought. This man was obviously a paladin and he was willing to kill me. She must have known too, I could feel her frustration and eagerness. The blades fell away from each other, she and the man fought furiously against one another, I could see the lights from behind my eyes knowing I couldn't do anything about it.

She lost her guard and he brought his sword in an arc to make contact with my leg. He sliced past the armour but not enough into the skin, it was merely a scratch however, his blade was fused with the light and the pain coursed throughout my body. Now she was angry. I could feel her anger radiate through-out each swing she took towards the man. She got lucky finally and he managed to mis-swing which enabled her to slash his side. He screamed in pain as the blood poured from his side down his silver armour, staining it with red. He was not done however, the cut only made him furious and he sprung back at me as if she didn't even hurt him. More flashes of light, increasing in frequency. He was tiring but she was not. Death knights could not tired like any other person, she had the leg up on him now. Despite her advantage he managed to fool her and he took a dummy swing forcing her to swing the wrong way leaving her right side undefended. He jabbed. The searing pain coursed up my arm making me scream in pain. She suddenly silenced me. I could feel my whole body expression changing. Before she could never change the expressions, now she had full control of my body. I no longer felt like I was looking through my own eyes but I felt as if I was looking from outside my body, looking at what used to be me.

I looked menacing, so scary. This is what she looked like... He eyes were aflame with a brilliant blue light and her hair shifted from silver to red as it blew in the wind. The man started to look worried as if he felt the change too. He went at me again. But she was quicker, so much quicker. I could feel her, she remembered the time Liviticus killed us once, and she was furious with it.

A roaring scream erupted from me, controlled by her and she drove the sword through the man's chest, shattering her armour and causing blood to spit from his mouth onto my face. She could taste the sweetness of his blood...She loved it. The man slumped onto his knees, dropping his blade into the long grass which was soaked in blood now. She withdrew the sword from his chest and kicked him over. Blood spurted from the gaping hole in his chest and she cackled at his death. Such an evil laugh...

**For once, I was scared of myself...**


	18. What Have I Done?

Chris Howard What Have I Done? 28/02/12

I looked at my hands and I looked over myself. I was becoming what Liviticus said I never was. I was a monster. A true crime against nature in my own way. "_Wow! Did you see that?! Five on one and he still walks! Now that's a weapon I must say, why aren't y-"_ I cut her off with screams. "Quiet! QUIET! YOU'VE RUINED ME! YOU'VE RUINED IT ALL! EVERYTHING I'VE DONE JUST TO BE EQUAL AND IT"S ALL GONE TO WASTE! JUST BECAUSE YOU WANTED HIM BACK AGAIN! YOU WANTED HIM FOR YOURSELF! YOU LOVED HIM, ADMIT IT!" I could feel her being stunned with the screams and the words were like poison to her. _"I did it because he was a perfect wea-"_ I cut her off again. "Stop saying that! He wasn't a weapon! He was a person! He was someone everyone can go to and you've tarnished him! Why didn't you leave him be?! Everyone hates me and Aneira can't even look at me anymore!" I fell to my knees and began beating the ground in a fury. "_Slyand stop and listen to me, if you didn't want him back, why didn't you stop me? You control this body over me, why didn't you stop me?"_ She was right, I did have control over her, I could do anything and she can't stop me. "I did try-" Now she started cutting me off, _"Don't lie Slyand, you didn't even try! I couldn't feel you resisting me! You wanted him back just as much as I did, even if it was for a different reason, don't even try pull that one on me."_Again she was right. Why was she always right?

I fell onto my side and looked over the cliffs of the Fjord. What if I...just disappeared...?


	19. I Can Solve This

Chris Howard I Can Solve This 28/02/12

By this time I had spent several hours just curled up on my side in silence, watching the birds fly to and from the cliff side. I had gotten over my tantrum-like rage and began to stand. I had noticed the blood stained grass around me then noticed the dried blood on my arm where the pole arm had got me. "O-Oh..." That was all I could muster to say. I sighed and began to make my silent and lonely journey back to Westguard again. Where did Loth go anyway? He wasn't there when I had come back to talk to Aneira. I didn't want to know I decided who know what I'd do to him. All this because he couldn't just leave the keep.

Suddenly it hit me; what if I got him to remember? I managed to do it before; I managed to remember and maintain some of my former personality... and then got -her-. Wretched bitch. Stuck in my mind causing chaos and havoc, all for her taste in blood and screams of agony. I wanted to rip her from my mind and fight her one on one. It was a shame it would have to wait, right now I have a situation to fix. Then everyone will see that I'm more than a walking corpse bent on killing.

**Every step Slyand took drove her closer to insanity. She twitched, her hair flashing red and her eyes constantly brightening then dulling. Who would have knows the one thing Slyand strived for would ultimately bring an end to her?**


	20. This Is Malice

Chris Howard This Is Malice 01/03/12

Something must have snapped right then and there in her own mind...All the things she said, she never mentioned to me or even suggested or hinted it. She sought to destroy me through the creation of Lothentiras. She had planned it all along and I never knew. I watched Lothentiras walk away onto his mount; I could feel her rage seep through her entire body...Yes, her body. I no longer wanted to be a part of her anymore, she can have the body she always desired and sought to own. It was hers now. Slyand is no more...Now there is only chaos, havoc and hate. She has everything she wants...but why is she still angry? She wanted something more again, something more than the simple satisfaction of causing misery to me. This was Malice...My other side.


	21. Slyand, You Idiot

Chris Howard Slyand...You Idiot... 06/03/12

I watched all the men and women gathered around the walls of Stromgarde; I watched how they were living their own lives so happily even if the Forsaken were marching this way. Yet I was here to kill and keep Malice at bay. Was fighting and killing worth the one special friend I had now? I sat at the back watching the men talk at the gate. I pulled out a parchment from my bag along with a rough writing instrument.

"Alis, I am truly ever so sorry for leaving -"

I stopped writing. I was stupid believing I could chuck this letter in the wind and hope she gets it somehow. She despised how I left without her and was willing to get myself killed. I didn't want her to get hurt..._"Oh quiet down Slyand, all night I've had to endure this pitiful blabbering. She doesn't fully understand you and never will. You're doing and fulfilling your only purpose but she is rendering you useless and has become a burden for the both of us!"_"She isn't..." If anyone could see me now, they'd think I was nuts and was talking to myself; "-She's just being herself, protective and that's what I like about her. You won't separate us, nothing you do will."

I could feel her hatred simmering in the back of my mind and I couldn't care less. I scanned over the ruins to see if I could see her, but could not. Maybe she was sleeping? "Yeah right, she'll never sleep again thanks to me." I scowled at a man who was looking at me oddly, and then he scooted away. **Slyand...You idiot...**


	22. Two Sides To a Story

Chris Howard Two Sides To A Story 19/03/12

I screamed. I hated being trapped in the back of her mind! I hated it! I wanted to force my way through and destroy her from the inside out. She was doing everything so wrong, misusing this body, MY body...We were not created to use our dulled emotions and waste them on people who would sooner sleep with you than to fight side by side. It was sickening me. I screamed again hoping Slyand would hear me and let me out. It was useless, she was far too focused on that girl...Alis'yria...She came out of nowhere and ruined me. I must get a grip of myself...

I battered at the edge of Slyand's mind, screaming in frustration. If only I had a body of my own, we'd go separate ways where she can do whatever she wants and I can go killing people and torturing them like I love to.

I gave one last bash on the edge of Slyand's mind and screamed in complete outrage and frustration. The best I could do to her was to make her twitch and shift her hair colour. I loved the colour red...Symbolises the colour of blood, anger, fury and hatred. Just what I needed. I needed out of this mind...I deserve this body...Slyand is an imposter. She thinks it was her family that died...It was **mine.**


	23. Something I've Never Done

Something I've Never Done 28/03/12

I could feel myself fading from existence and so could Slyand, something was wrong with her and for once, I had to help her to help myself. I began to speak my mind. My voice sounded weak and feeble. _"S-Sly? Something is wrong. I can feel it from within you, want to tell me what's wrong?" _She began to speak and I felt a small sense of emotion that was new in her. "I feel forgotten by everyone I know, except Alis but she's upset about something...Probably me..." I lingered in the back of her mind quietly, contemplating about what to do. It was simple, we just have to find the Duskers, Aneira may still want to hurt Slyand for what I did though.

I felt different. I couldn't explain why but I had to confess to Aneira for what I did and tell her Slyand had nothing to do with it. I wasn't going to get rid of Slyand so I'll have to live with her in a way. Even if Alis wanted me gone too. Well tough, this is my body just as much as it is Slyand's.

It's time to start something I'd never thought I'd do, **I'll try to get Slyand's life back...**


	24. An Insight

An Insight 25/04/2012

It's been a matter of weeks since Malice and I had ceased with the fighting between one another and although it sounds like a good thing, it doesn't feel right. I can feel her presence and her hold weaken. Almost if she's given up and has left her own thoughts unguarded. The thought of losing her worried me, not because she protected me and herself, but losing her would be losing half of what I really am.

I sat down on a stone bench in the dead of night in Stormwind. Only few remained awake as far as I could tell. The homeless, the ones running late errands...Probably thieves. I had thought about the encounter on the bridge with Liviticus, how was it possible that he came back? Why hasn't he told me anything yet about it? I do think I deserve to know at least...And what was wrong with him the other day...He wouldn't talk to me and dismissed me. _"He was standing in front of a grave Sly, he's told you of his past and what happened. Give the man some peace. He'll talk to you in his own time."_The words startled me, when had Malice become this sympathetic? Especially to him, the one who she had a grudge on in the past. _"I'm warning you for your own sake Slyand. He's back now and he'll talk to you soon..."_It was strange to hear her in such a long time; her voice in my mind had weakened.

My thoughts ran, pondering on what was happening. It was at that moment Malice opened up her thoughts to me and I finally understood her.


	25. Feel What I Feel, Burn The Way I Burned

Feel What I Feel, Burn The Way I Burned 2012-04-29

((See previous adventure No. 24 to understand))

No...I didn't understand her. Her thoughts ploughed through mine, I could feel them tainting my mind and memories. Images of her past deeds that I was unaware of bore down on me, overwhelming my mind. Images of the people she's killed and images of when she tortured Brinna, I could see it all again, vivid as if I were reliving the past. She had broke her fingers and wrist and then she chained her to the wall in shackles. Her armour was broken and cracked, she was stripped of her dignity. Her hair lay on the floor around her as she looked down in disgrace. I could hear her cackling in the back of my mind. The laughter pierced me and I cringed._"You thought I had become sympathetic for you? For anyone? Slyand, you do not know me. This may be your body but I am superior. You had let your guard down and what a foolish thing to do. I only helped you in my best interests, I couldn't give a damn what you did and I never will. Watch now as I do what I was created to do...What we were created to do. Be a weapon of war and killing."_ The words stung me like a hot blade searing its way through my chest. _"This is how I felt when your Paladin killed me! __**FEEL WHAT I FEEL, BURN THE WAY I BURNED!**__"_ Her laughter ringing through me sent me to my knees, my head spun and my vision going blurry then blackened.

I was standing on a road in Duskwood - No, kneeling. Kneeling over an unrecognisable corpse, blood strewn across the bricks and flesh maimed and torn hanging limply from the carcass. I got up, my head stinging. I lifted my hand up to my head but was stopped and a dreadful sight. I knew I was capable of seeing blood...and lots of it but the blood on my hand dripped slowly off onto the floor. Chunks of flesh littered the puddle I was standing in. Blood adorned my armour making the once blue armour glow dark red. I was caked from head to toe in blood and chunks of flesh. I turned around and saw two more unrecognisable bodies, similar to the first body.

What had she done...This was not the Malice I knew before, this was an abomination in my mind, growing on me, hell-bent on consuming me from the inside out. I heard laughter, her laughter. She knows I'm weakened. It's only a matter of time.


	26. Weakened and Alone

Weakened And Alone 02/05/2012

Weak, pathetic, worthless. Just a few of the things she calls me. She keeps brining up the images of the past to truly make me feel worse. Slowly she broke me down after I had brought myself up again so long ago. Her laugh, still piercing me. My head ached and my bones creaked. She was breaking me down physically to make room for her. No one can help me now, she's too far in for me to remove and I'm too weak to do it alone.

I brought my hand close to my face and watched it quiver even as I willed it to stop. I sighed, letting my hand fall onto the ground I had sat down on. I weaved my hands through the grass already dampened by the dew. This was probably the last time I would feel anything. I smiled grimly, after so long I tried to keep as many friends as possible and willed myself better than useless, stronger than weak and to have a purpose. Now...Now I sit here shaking and quivering at my demise only to let my body be taken over by someone I once knew as a friend. I sit here alone and weak...Malice was right, I was weak. I was pathetic. Now everyone will see it. What a fool I was to think I was better. It cost me everything.

I watched the sky and wept quietly, regardless if I could weep or not. I did not weep for Malice taking over, I wept for facing a fate far worse than death. Being imprisoned in my own mind and ruled by a malicious tyrant.

I clung to the last of my untainted memories. I clung, fearful for losing them to a monster. I let my body hit the ground and made my way to the back of my mind. **I was nothing now.**


	27. Back to Where It All Began

I stood there looking over Terrokar Forest in the dreaded outlands. The horizon shone a sickly green mixed with the orange of the nearby stars. Eclipse Vanguard had disbanded as I watched from a distance. I could easily make out what was happening. People crying and hugging one another. It made me sick to the stomach. Another home lost and I was cast aside. Was there really any point for me to continue my search? I wracked my brain for an answer but found none.

I looked down at my muddy boots that stood upon the bones that were strewn across the Bone Wastes surrounding Auchindoun. This was where I belonged...almost. I belonged to the dead, i control them at my whim. I sensed a Draenei spirit float on by. I extended a pale hale towards it while grinning from ear to ear, showing the cold sharp teeth that i now beared. With my hand extended to it, i muttered a few words of the damned and closed my hand. The Draenei spirit stopped and was raised slightly higher. Although it's image was faint, i could make out the spirit was a female and hand her hands on her throat. I was chocking her. Even the spirits can't escape the suffering. With the thought, i let her go. Her image slumped to the ground while I stared at it. I was a prime example of the dead suffering.

I shook my head as if to fling the thought away. This was no suffering. It was a gift. I could control the dead and spread diseases as i please. I grinned and snickered to myself. It was only at this point did i realise that the spirit had slunk away. I shrugged ever so slightly and continued walking over the bone which crunched and split under the plate boots. The armour I wore was dirty and broken while a thick layer of dried blood still caked over certain places. My ragged cloak flapped in the wind.

I don't need a home. No one needed my help. There was only one place to go now. Where it all began.

Northrend.


End file.
